Bridezilla

As I've mentioned I'm getting married. In fact, I am getting married in exactly three months from today. And in three months and one day I can breathe a huge sigh of relief. Don't get me wrong, I'm am looking forward to getting married in a big way, really, I am. However, at times (which seem to be happening more and more lately) I am looking forward to this whole thing being over with. To be honest I haven't had it bad thus far. Mark and I got engaged March 19 2007 and I started planning March 20 2007.

Well, okay, I've been planning for longer then that. I think I was 12 when I bought my first wedding magazine. That's right, I'm one of "those" girls. I've been dreaming about my wedding for years and years. I actually have one of those rubber maid containers in my basement filled with old wedding mag's from years past with stickies and post-it's on the pages I flagged because I like the dress/hairstyle/flowers/plate setting/colors/etc. Most of which are completely hideous. I mean if you think regular fashion from the 80's was bad, the wedding fashion was way worse. I mean, those puffy shoulders, the crystal beading, the huge bows on the back side! Who wants their back side to look even bigger by putting some massive tulle bow on?? And I kept these magazines thinking I could reference them in the future when I was actually going to get married. Riiiiiiiiiiiiight. If I showed up to my wedding wearing what I thought was actually pretty back then Mark and everyone else would have run out of the church laughing, pointing and crying all at the same time.

Anyways, you get the picture. I love (correction...loved) weddings. I even fancied the idea at one point in my adulthood of becoming a wedding planner. Truthfully, it still enters my mind every once and while. One of my girlfriends even bought my a "How to become a wedding planner" book for my birthday a few years back. Then...I got engaged, and it begun. This moment, this time in my life that I've been waiting for finally happened. So it was no surprise that I jumped in guns a blazin'. In a matter of a month I had the date picked, the church arranged and the reception site planned. I even had all of my bridesmaids lined up ready to answer to my ever call. So, it should be no surprise that it all started to fall apart as fast as it came together. See, I forgot one crucial point in all of this, I have a fiance, and maybe I should swing some of my ideas past him. My bad. See, I had been waiting for so long to get engaged that when it happened I just assumed I could take care of the rest myself, seeing as I had been planning in my head without having to ask anyone else for their opinion, why should that change right? WRONG! The thing is that even if Mark doesn't want to admit it this is his day as well, and he wants to have just as much as a say in things as I do. He's not the kind to sit by and let it all happen around him. He didn't agree with the church, the reception, and the most heartbreaking....he didn't like my girlfriend that I had asked to be my maid of honor. In fact, it was almost a deal breaker for him. She's out, or he's out. He never said it...but I knew it.

Side note...Mark would never make me choose like that. NEVER. But he wouldn't have been happy, and in turn I wouldn't have been happy. There's a history there and it just wouldn't have worked, and I really should have known better to ask her in the first place. I knew he would be upset, but I just got caught up in all the excitement and it just sort of happened. So, to make what could be a long blog even longer I'll just say I took care of the situation gracefully. My girlfriend and I remain good friends. It may have been awkward at first but it is a clear case of time healing all wounds. We've moved on, and that's all I'll say about that. I now have three amazing bridesmaids (groom approved) whom I love with all my heart, and will prove to be even more beautiful then me on the big day, inside and out.

Back to the planning. Once I got used to the idea of there being two people involved in this wedding the situation became easier. We found a church we BOTH liked, a reception site we BOTH like and so on and so on. The planning could now start...again. And then it happened...again. WE didn't realize that this wedding wasn't for the two of us, it was for us, and the parents, and the parents friends we just HAD to invite, and the parents friends that we've never met that we HAD to invite and blah blah blah. Suddenly it wasn't just me loosing control, now it was us loosing control. It started with my mom, which sucked because it would seem like my mom was the only one creeping into our wedding. Then, Mark's mom started, and we had both of them creeping into our plans. Now, I've watched these shows on TLC about brides freaking out here and there. I didn't want to be one of these brides. Besides, I'm "Super Bride" who is amazingly organized, efficient, and just all around amazing. There's nothing I can't handle. In my dreams. Well, I have to give myself some credit. We have done well, and things have gone smooth so far. I secured locations, florist, DJ, limo's, and dresses nice and early so that if things fell apart we had time to re-order, re-book, and re-dress. Good thing too because my wedding dress came in wrong. I ordered an ivory dress with a cinnamon sash and what I got was a cinnamon dress with and ivory sash. A little too goth for me thank you! The correct wedding gown arrived three months later. Then they called and said my grad dress was in. Funny, I graduated 10 years ago. So they called back, "sorry, it's your junior bridesmaid dress that's in". Weird, we don't' have one of those. Call number three "it's the mother of the bride dress". Okay I thought, so I called my mom, only to find out she didn't order a dress. This was bridezilla's first showing. I decided no more phone calls. I went there to see what they had in person. Nothing. They had nothing. I was called totally in error. Weird. I got a call last night that the three bridesmaids dresses I ordered was in. I'm not excited yet, I have to go down and see what is really in before I trust that call. We did put the parents at bay, and I did have to start putting my foot down on certain things. Mark's mom wants horrible, icky, boring posed formal pictures. I hate those. Those stand in a line, put your arm here and tilt your head and "everyone smile!" pictures. Hate 'em. I like natural, fun, casual, different pictures. So, we had the photographer put in the contract that she listens to no one but Mark and I. That's it. She takes guidance from no one else. My mom wants the seating arrangements a certain way. She wants this group of people sitting here, and she wants to sit here, and they should sit there. No. I told her last night that she's going to sit where I put her and if she doesn't like she can sit at the kiddie table. I kid, of course, but she got the idea. I told her that she doesn't have the biggest say, me and Mark do. Period.

So, for the first time in a year and a half of being engaged bridezilla has started to make her showing. Although, I don't want to think of myself like that. Lets call me mini-bridezilla. Although, I have to keep in mind that I still have three months to go, and this is the time when it can all go south, so mini-bridezilla could become MECCA-BRIDEZILLA. Crushing all that get in her way!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!! tee hee